I spent nearly every summer night calling or texting every friend in my address book, searching for the lucky friend whose parents had left for the weekend. The lucky fellow this weekend was Andy. Andy has had millions of blowouts over the years and this was expected to be another thriller. Andy came through once again and had a bash that was enjoyed by hundreds of our friends. The party was literally shaking the house, and it even extended into the back porch. It was one of those parties where everybody was so happy that they were not the person hosting it because we all knew exactly what the house would look like afterward. But the party was not all smiles and cheers.
I am assuming that eastern Ohio is like most places in that after a few kegs are tapped, somebody feels the need to start a fight. And sometime between 2 and 5 am, somebody broke one of Andy's Mom's bottles of wine. This wine collection was in the basement, and everybody knew it was off limits. The wine probably did not cost more than $50 for the whole bottle, but because it was not in a box we all just assumed it was something that came from France and was at least 100 years old. It also did not help that the bottle had been smashed into fragments by hitting the top of Andy's head. Andy then felt it was necessary to kick everybody out of his house, or try to at least.
Andy began shouting and screaming that he was going to call the cops (like that would ever happen). Bottles were being thrown and people were getting far more stirred up than a few hours before. The cops came (Andy made the call) and everybody scrambled to get out of there. I can not remember exactly why I wanted to run into the woods, but I felt a burning desire to sprint off of Andy's back porch and thrust myself into the wilderness. It may have been to save myself from the long arm of the law, or it could have been that I had drank too much. Either way I was scared, confused, and excited.
This was the roughest forestry I had ever experienced in my life. I am not saying it resembled Northern Canada, but it appeared dense to my squinted eyes. I could not see anything, and I had no idea what berries were good for me, how to make a fire, or anything else Bear Grylls or Steve Erwin would be able to do. I was not prepared. I did not have any of the special gear that nature dwellers are constantly wearing on the Discovery Channel. Every story I have ever heard about survival in the woodlands dealt with at least one character having something that went wrong. I had nothing to go wrong with; no matches that got wet, I did not lose a compass, and I certainly did not let a tent blow away in the wind. I was alone in what might as well have been the Amazon, and it was starting to get cold. Any type of supplies would have allowed me to fare well in the harsh backwoods of Cadiz, Ohio, but I just did not have any.
In the very few seconds after darting off of Andy's property, I faintly remember tripping and landing by a large tree. This tree shocked me when I stared into its base that seemed massive in the moonlight. I could not do anything but clench this tree and never let go until I felt safe enough to open my eyes again. Nobody wants to be crawling on the floor of the forest without so much as a sleeping bag, but I had the tree and that was as safe as I was going to get. The thought of navigating through the ridiculous terrain had crossed my mind, but that light bulb was short-lit and I wound up wrapping myself around the timber.
The fury of nature's night was something I had never dealt with before, and I am proud to have come out alive. The sounds throughout the night were excruciating; I heard hoots and howls that sent chills down my spine. Every rustle of the leaves was surely a large black bear coming to steal my tree and eat me alive. As if the sounds were not enough, I had to deal with the bugs crawling all over me. It felt as though giant ants or spiders were slipping into my clothes and through my hair, and I was helpless. My mom once told me about a report that stated: the average human eats 7 spiders in his/her lifetime. I think I hit my quota that night. As stated earlier: I wasn't prepared. I didn't even have bug spray. I'm not sure how it happened with all of nature's forces against me, but I fought through the noise and the insects and finally fell asleep.
Being woken up by a sunrise is something that everybody should experience at least once. The few minutes it took for me to fully wake up were beautiful. The warmth of the sun seemed to heal me of everything I had been through the night before. I finally had some heat and some light. The sun shined over me and all the surroundings that inhibited me just hours ago. As my pupils focused themselves, I was shocked at everything the glorious sun decided to show me. Once I got to my feet I realized that I was still in Andy's back yard. I, apparently, had tripped over some shrubs towards the end of Andy's property, and landed by a small tree. I spent the night not in the woods, but instead, surrounded by grass and landscaping in somebody's backyard. The night in the woods left me with nothing but scrapes from the shrubbery and a promise to never drink again.
I was thrown into nature, and into a situation that did not enable me to appreciate it. My lack of being prepared was the downfall and caused me to walk away from my incident without a positive outlook on nature. I know nature has beauty, and I've seen it on TV and read about it in books, but because I was not prepared, I could not learn of it for myself.
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